John Astin is an aging hippie about to discover what Hell has in store for him in the Night Gallery segment “Hell’s Bells,” reviewed here.
“Hell’s Bells”***
Teleplay by Theodore J. Flicker • Story by Harry Turner
Directed by Theodore J. Flicker
John Astin as Randy Miller
Theodore J. Flicker as the Devil/First Demon
Jody Gilbert as the Fat Lady
Ceil Cabot as Mrs. Tourist
John J. Fox as Mr. Tourist
Hank Worden as the Bore
Jack Laird as the Second Demon
Gene R. Kearney as the Third Demon
Randy Miller (John Astin, quite funny), firmly enmeshed in the counterculture of the day (1971), in both attire and argot, if a bit old for it (Astin was 41 at the time this was shot), drives his car off a dark highway and dies in a fiery crash. He sees rotating heads of three demons who make silly faces and spout garbled words, then he slides through a sort of laundry chute and is deposited into Hell…’s waiting room. Yes, Hell has a waiting room.
There’s a poster on the wall listing all the things one can’t do there: no smoking, standing, littering, talking, etc. “A bummer” of a place as Randy says. He takes out a fresh stick of gum to chew and tosses the wrapper on the floor and immediately a plump woman appears to chastise him for his transgression.
“Lady,” he begins. “Fat lady,” she corrects him. She vanishes as abruptly as she appeared and Randy begins to contemplate what he imagines it will be like once he leaves the waiting room and enters Hell. He visualizes a series of classical drawings depicting various degrees of physical human suffering.
Finally, the door to his destination opens and he steps inside…another dull-looking room. But this one has a huge stack of albums that piques his interest. However, the first one that plays is not a period selection of classic rock, but rather something a lot more “square” to his tastes and he can’t get it to stop playing.
He notices an older man in the room and is grateful for the chance at conversation. But this man, too, is not the type of person Randy finds interesting, dully discussing such topics as crop rotation.
Next appear a husband and wife, dressed in Hawaiian shirts, promising to begin showing him their 8,500-strong collection of vacation slides from their recent trip to Tijuana. Downer, man!
Growing more and more impatient, Randy demands that the Devil show himself and explain what’s going on. He does, in the form of the segment’s writer and director, Theodore J. Flicker. The Devil is dressed in red and has horns, but he’s not nearly as frightful or imposing as Randy expects. In fact, he’s kind of a short, pudgy middle-aged guy in a not-too-convincing costume.
Randy wants to know where the fire and brimstone Hell he imagined is. The Devil explains that “Hell is never what you expect it to be. But for you, this is it. It’s a curious thing, but they have the exact same room up there (gesturing toward heaven). You see, while this room is absolute Hell for you, up there it is someone else’s idea of heaven.” And with that he disappears, leaving aging hippie Randy Miller to collapse and writhe around the ground with the knowledge that this is how he will spend eternity—with lame music, a boring old farmer chattering about completely uninteresting things and a couple showing an endless parade of vacation slides. With narration, of course.
Kathy Juhl said:
Nice job, Mr. Juhl!
jean's bored companion said:
Just this evening I was telling an elderly neighbor about this episode, which I probably saw once at the age of 12 or 13 and I still vaguely remember. This same neighbor who tells me the same boring stories of her ‘glory days’ day after day (I am employed by her children to check on her twice a day). She also asked me last week if I believed in heaven or hell, of course the answer was no.
thank you for the review
djuhl22 said:
Glad you enjoyed the review and thank you for reading.
DONALD SARIAN said:
We. Do.go for review. And any thing we had no.remorse we repeat like hells bells till were sick.of it. We can only judge ourselves I
Bob Laughlin said:
Jean’s bored companion: Your review is fascinating. Was the writing of it intentional on your part? Did you tell your elderly neighbor about the episode as a hint? Did the neighbor take the hint? Your review could be combined with the episode into an everlasting loop. Unfortunately, you’d wind up in hell with your elderly neighbor.
Rich Vernadeau said:
Great episode, great review, and very revealing about how our perception of things determines our reality.
djuhl22 said:
Thanks for reading and I’m glad you enjoyed the review.
estebang said:
Thank You. That episode is permanently ingrained into my psyche. But the psyche gets warped from time to time, so it is nice to read details.
djuhl22 said:
You’re welcome; glad you and others enjoy reading these.
Victoria Wren said:
This was one of the second season episodes that really didn’t work for me; maybe because the “hippie” character was such a caricature (and, as portrayed, an anachronism) that the story was never rooted in any real human situation or emotion for me; maybe because the theme, one person’s heaven is another person’s hell, is hardly original (in fact, I think it was done several times over Night Gallery’s 3-season run alone).
Ciro Grassi said:
I remember watching this episode as a kid. I had to be 9 or 10. This episode is how I learned that the Beatles broke up. That’s the thing I remember about it the most.
Susan MacNeilly Peifer said:
I have been trying to find out the name of this episode for YEARS. I thought it was on the Twilight Zone. I remember when I first saw it thinking : How genius it was, especially that long ago. Put a whole new perspective on heaven and hell for sure.!!!
David Juhl said:
Great; glad my reviews could help! How did you find your way here if I may ask? Also, it’s a pretty cool ep, a time capsule of that era for sure.
Anthony Caldwell said:
Why doesn’t anyone know who recorded the instrumental version of “You’re A Sweetheart” in the episode Hells Bells. I’ve looked everywhere And there is no finding it
Yog Sothoth said:
Anthony Caldwell: this comes close to what was heard
https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=_KAQj9_8QPU&feature=share
Yog Sothoth said:
Would you happen to know the title of the music that was playing from the stack of records?
David Juhl said:
I’m afraid I don’t know that. When I get a chance I will re-watch the episode and look into it. Thank you so much for taking the time to comment and for reading my reviews!
Fan said:
Was this episode edited? I remember John Astin asking if there was anything to smoke, even a little…like a roach (slang for pot) And the boring guy said “Oh no, we use to have roaches but got rid of them. The bore talks about beatles here but I recall the other line that was said.
David Juhl said:
I can’t say that I recall that specific line, but it may have been in the original and perhaps you watched the version for syndication (where edits were common). Thanks for reading and commenting!
Rich Vernadeau (@Gideon137) said:
David Juhl, thought you might enjoy my video on the paintings of NIGHT GALLERY: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=li8kCOCPfD0
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Donald Sarian said:
I love tune. It was interesting sound just like one they used